Sketch Friday 28th May 2021

Things are opening up. Things are moving on. A lot of people during this pandemic have been here before, I suppose. But this is the first time for us. I had my 2nd jab this week (thank you NHS for delivering this despite the Johnson administration. And yes, anyone would have found it hard to lead during this awful time. But no, many many other people could and would have done better. And I didn't need Cumming's bile fueled attempt at revising the historical record before it has been written to know that). And my aunt has had her 2nd jab. And so we are no longer shielding. Even if we are not rushing out. Neither are we hiding away anymore. So this week has felt like a very strange week. So much feels like it has happened because, compared to the last 18 months of my life, it has. I have cycled to have a real life work meeting. I have been to the theatre and watched the house lights come down. I have finally seen AND held one of the babies born during lock down, that I have been longing to cuddle. (Reader I cuddled him and he is gorgeous). I have run and walked and drawn and watched the late spring unfold into early summer. I have started new dramaturgical conversations. I have done planning work with my (as yet unnamed) climate grief collective. I have experimented with new art materials. I have continued to practice drawing dear Matthew Bellwood's face and thought a great deal about our up coming dramaturgical adventure. How WILL drawing and dramaturgy work together and inform one another. I don't know yet, but soon I shall.. I have watched, written and thought about TV. A fuck ton. I love TV. I have been honing my new telly treatment. I have talked with mentees and have been beautifully mentoured myself (thank you Ben). I have hugged a friend. Hugged a friend? Hugged a friend! It's all been amazing and lovely and overwhelming and odd. But the biggest change this week is that I think I have really begun to think about beyond now in a way I have not for so long. What things from this time do I want to take with me into the new world that's arriving? And what things do I dare to begin dreaming of for that future? What, beyond the groove of the familiar hamster wheel I have been pacing for the last year and half, might occur just beyond the horizon? It's a strange exciting but slightly melancholic feeling. Its rising makes me remember a part of me that has lain dormant for so long. It makes what has been turned off or down (so that I might find ways to survive) explicit. So much life not lived. But nonetheless, it's beautiful too. Because I am a lucky one and I am still here. So then. The idea of ‘what do I want to dare to dream of now?’ is returning. And that's the news. Massive love to all. #sketchfriday #sketch #draw #paint #watercolour #pencil #ink #someweirdpencilsthatdissolveinwatercool #experiments #laradarlingearnshaw #cat #clematis #strawberry #plant #friend #baby #portrait #selfportrait #writing #dramaturgy #tvwriting #tv #matthewbellwood